We Fight, We Fuck, We Fall Asleep
Or: On Projects
As 2023 draws rapidly to a close I am in a reflective mood as so many people are. Something about the calendar turning to a new one makes me want to stop and reflect on what the hell I actually accomplished and what I hope to accomplish in the next turning of the calendar.
Without a doubt its been a pretty damn productive few years for me. But focusing on 2023 I had good vacations in Palm Springs, Mexico, and Portland. I got a new job. I learned how to build a bike. I did a lot of house projects. I did some reading, I did some writing, I did some work on personal projects, I sort of resurrected this old thing. I loved, I lost I raged against the dying of that good night. Ok that might be taking it too far.
One of the weird things I am really proud of is actually building that bike. I had never really done anything beyond oil a chain and make minor adjustments but I managed to strip a bike down to its frame, install a new bottom bracket, new chainring and cranks, new rear sprocket, new brakes new cables and housing, new shifter… really just about everything. Its still a heavy as sin bike and it kind of rides … its not a nimble bike but its nice to be able to look at something and say “I did that” which isn’t always something I get to say very often. So behold:
Work has been an interesting transition. I am much happier than I was at my last position and am much better suited to it but its also a bit of a hearkening to my first job post college. Lots of busy, lots of year end madness, lots of shifting priorities. But its also something that I am being able to make into my own, its something I feel i do well, and the people are great. And unlike back then I am paid enough to actually go enjoy my life at least somewhat. As such, another vacation in Palm Springs in about a month.
One of the nice things about what has changed over the last year or so is how much more comfortable I am in just saying “Fuckit we ball” and trying something. Again a throwback but again in a good way. The bike up there is one example, another is replacing my car speakers tonight, another is getting a roof put on my house. Did i know how to do any of this shit before I did it? No. Are they all done? Yes.* Because fuckit we ball.
I am also getting a bit more back on the personal health bandwagon. This is more of a return to form after years of COVID and laziness and whatever else. I rejoined the gym back in January (maybe mentioned here already) and its been a good thing. I am not as consistent about diet or drinking or anything else that I was prior to a global pandemic but I am making progress. My weight has gone down, I feel better, some health stuff has gotten better. Another project although this one only ends when I do.
My personal life hasn’t changed much, which is probably a good thing. I definitely tend towards a bit of stability in that department and even though my current partner (3+ years and counting) doesn’t necessarily tend towards stability in most things its still working. Keep n keeping on till it doesn’t make sense anymore or something. That said they are going through a rough time and i definitely feel bad about it. Not really much I can do about said rough time but its true. Who knows, maybe I will see my old therapist about it for a bit just to sort of recenter myself.
Other than that, probably all the news fit to print today at least.
*One of them still needs to be installed because it was getting cold and dark but should be completed tomorrow afternoon so… close enough for a blog nobody reads?
